TripLekLek, the world as seen by a thai girl

admin April 21st, 2007

A week ago in Gili Trawangan Luca had an idea to go to Gili Meno by canoe.
First, I am silent, then I said yes, but if we can find a canoe for 2 persons.
The next morning we were walking and looking for the canoe but we couldn’t find it.
Luca was looking at me and said “Lek, let’s try one each, if you can’t do, just tell me”.
I can do it. I can do it. I keep telling my self after I hear that sentence.
My heart start feeling fear but I said to myself “I must try it maybe I can do it”.

I am afraid of the water because I can’t swim and many years ago, when I was 17 years old, I was sinking in the water two times in the same year.
After that I am afraid to go in the deep water. If I feel my feet don’t touch the sand I will never go in the water

This time I was thinking that maybe I might be lucky if I can do it, so finally I can win my fear.
So we go.
I try first to keep the canoe near the beach for feel of safety and then let it far and far, step by step.

We agree to try to go to Gili Meno and Luca ’s canoe stay beside me to make me feel safe.

We were almost half way to Gili Meno.
In front of me I see the strong wave move around like circle and I am looking to the water: it’s very deep and blue now.
I started calling Luca loud “Luca I fear..I fear I can’t do it, let’s go back now”.
Luca said to me “o.k. we go back slowly don’t feel fear”.
I turned back to the beach of Gili Trawangan suddenly and I go fast.

When I arrived to the beach of Gili Tarwangan I looked at the distance to Gili Meno.
I feel stupid, but at least I tried to do it and I almost can.
I though if I can do so I will win my fear but it would be more nice if I not have any fear in my heart and I do it because I am happy to do it and I enjoy.

I though there are many people who try to win the nature by climbing the high mountain , by deep diving, surfing or many ways, because they want to prove to themself that they can do it and make people remember them.
Many people are the winners but many people leave someone behind with a sad story.
I might say the nature is a strong power and we are slave of it.
Because we are humans and the nature made us with different color or different shape depending on the place we stay.
As long as we are humans we still learn and try to win the nature, but believe me you never want to win the nature but actually you want to win the fear in your heart.
This is what I tried and I will try it again one day!

Sawasdee Kha!

Lek

• My Travels , Indonesia , Gili